Print This PostMy friend Russell went to heaven yesterday
Last evening around 8 pm, I listened to a voicemail from Violet Smith. She informed me that Russell-her only son-had passed away earlier in the day. My heart was cracked open as I realized that a man I have only known for a couple of years will no longer call, or accept my calls; will no longer be able to ride the bike I fixed up for him; will no longer have to struggle with the mental and physical problems that have shaped his life for so long. Russell is really home. He is in paradise with his Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Russell and I met back in 2008. I was volunteering as a mentor to residents of Helping Up Mission in downtown Baltimore. Helping Up Mission has a year-long, intense spiritual recovery program that graduates over 100 men every year. Most of these men come from the streets of Baltimore where drugs and alcohol have relegated them to crackhouses, dumpsters, and cardboard boxes. For many of them, this is their best, last hope.
I have written earlier posts about Helping Up Mission; what I wanted to share with you today is what the life and death and homegoing of Russell Smith means to me, his mom, Violet, and to you. 
Russell and I met at a luncheon where mentors have a chance to meet men from HUM that are looking for a mentor. I didn’t meet Russell until the very end when God intervened and got us to talking. After sharing parts of our stories with each other, Russell asked me if I would be his mentor. What was I going to do? How about the next right thing and leave the results to God.
Since I was un-employed at the time, and had flexibility to be there when I wanted, I found out Russ’s schedule and agreed to meet him the following week. We ended up meeting on Wednesday’s at 10 am when he was in Bible Class. It allowed me the opportunity to refresh my Bible knowledge under a great Bible teacher and archaeologist, Gary Byers, who is the Spiritual Director of HUM. It also allowed me to interact with the other residents in the same phase as Russell. Once they heard enough of my story, I was accepted very readily!
After class, Russell and I would sit and talk in the lounge area, or go for a walk to the local store and get a drink (non-alcoholic!), and whatever else he needed to make his life as normal as possible, and then go back to the Mission for lunch. Sometimes, we would go for a walk and buy lunch in the area. His favorite food was Burger King with all the trimmings. After lunch we would share with each other what was going on in our lives and I would encourage him to try and do the next right thing, based upon our understanding of addiction, the 12 recovery steps, and the Word of God.
I have many memories of our times together. When I finally went back to work, we could no longer get together during the day, so I would leave work and try to meet him for dinner at HUM. We would then share with each other, and then walk to an AA meeting in the area.
Living in an environment with a hundred other men who were more familiar with degredation and despair than hope and healing played a large part in Russell’s decision to leave in February of 2009. He couldn’t seem to stop taking inventory of the other men and concentrate on working on himself.
To be fair to Russell, he loved the Lord and His Word. I remember, like it was yesterday, how excited he was about the opportunity to go to Bible College. He wanted to give back, and share the Word with others. God had other plans. His ways are not our ways.
Russell had worked as a steelworker and had several accidents that basically tore his shoulders apart. He couldn’t lift his arms above the level of his face. All the years of hard living and drug abuse had taken it’s toll. He was being treated for mental, physical, and emotional problems that interfered with his spiritual growth and maturity. I was as pro-active as I possibly could be in helping Russell to get the healthcare he needed. Taking him to the right staff members to arrange the outside care he needed, going with him to the different clinics, encouraging him to learn to stick up for himself.
Russell finally snapped. I’m not too sure I wouldn’t have if I was Russell. Lost his temper, said things he shouldn’t have, and left 2 months before graduation. He ended up moving in with his mom, Violet, and was finally approved for Social Security. After the split with HUM, all he did was sit around the house and watch TV and movies on a portable DVD player I had bought him for Christmas. That’s what he wanted. Several times I visited him in Essex and got him out of the house for awhile. We went to a music store and bought some cables so he could hook up his electric guitar to a small amp and practice his music. He wanted to play Christian music for others. He felt that God had a music ministry for him.
Have you ever heard of H.A.L.T.? It is an acronym for hungry, angry, lonely, and tired. Those are the times that substance abusers are particularly prone to want to pick up their drug of choice. Russell was angry, lonely, and tired. He started drinking again last fall. Not constantly, but enough for Violet to find out and read him the riot act.
Last year, before Christmas, I invited Russell out here in the country to spend the night. Peace and quiet and Mom’s great cooking. The picture you see of Russell was taken then. He had a Harley_Davidson hat on that I gave him, and a grin from ear to ear.
As most of you have probably realized by now, writing all this down is helping me to remember Russell, and in the process, to work out some of my angst about his passing. Russell was tired of not being able to breathe, did not want a tracheotomy, and basically gave them permission to let him die.
Violet and I talked for about 30 minutes last night. Russell did not want any kind of service because he knew his mom, being un-employed, with no life insurance, couldn’t afford it. He will be autopsied to try and determine why they couldn’t treat the infection, any organs that are useable will be harvested, and then he will be cremated. Before I got off the phone, I prayed with Violet. She needs all our prayers.
I am enclosing Violet’s address in case you would like to send her a card or flowers or a gift to help her out financially.
Violet Smith, 700 Pine Branch Place, Apt D, Essex, MD 21221
P.S. It’s okay with Violet if I arrange a memorial service of some kind for Russell. Maybe this is it. We’ll see. I’ll let you know if anything else is planned.
Russell Smith, you are my friend. I will miss you. I’m glad you aren’t suffering any longer. I’ll stay in touch with your Mom. Tell Jesus Hi! for me. Talk to you soon.
Love, Harv
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July 23rd, 2010 at 7:22 am
Hi buddy,
Thanks so much for bringing Russell’s passing to my attention. If there is a memorial, let us know. Thanks also for your long term investment in his life. I am also so happy to see how you are continuing in your walk.
If you want to come back down to any morning class and tell your story, I would love to have you.
Blessing all day long,
GARY B